it wasn't lemon gatorade
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
you will always have a special place in my vag
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
Maid of honor screwed up the joke so I just got to explain what a strap on is and why a married lady might want one to Grandma and my brother's wedding shower.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
