Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Sex followed by chicken and waffles... Hands down my favorite morning plans. Count me in.
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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