I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
It's blow job season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
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