I think my fart just growled at me.
woke up this morning with "hah" written on my penis.i was like wtf?? morning wood kicked in and found out what it really said, haNNah.then i remembered.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
Randomize
