I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
