all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
To show us how offended you were you took off the right foot of your pterodactyl suit and proceeded to attack us with it.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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