Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
I love you more than champagne and correct grammar
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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