I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
We just got in a fight with grandma b/c she tried to tell us you didn't go hard.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
