I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
this boner is exhausting
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
She looks like if Peter Griffin was a lesbian.
Run away.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
