This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Houston, we have a squirter
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
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You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest