I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube