I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
he was CRYING into my vagina
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
Randomize
