He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Screw this I'm going to go talk to her. If you hear sirens they're for me.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
THERE IS WEED IN MY OVEN. HOW AM I EVER SUPPOSED TO MAKE CHICKEN PARMESAN WITH WEED IN MY OVEN.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
