Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
I think I used your jacking off shit when I showered. I couldn't see shit, it was all oily. Fuck power outages
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
I need to stop challenging people to taking off clothes. I win too often
Idk, apparently drinking five Four Loko's and trying to fight a mailbox constitutes disorderly conduct.
Randomize