i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
All I'm wearing right now is a condom and a sock.
Just one?
Yup. One sock.
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Randomize
