sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Somewhere between the 30 minutes of cunnilingus, the improvised song about the Olympics, and the super thoughtful shower beer... I knew I married the right guy
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
