in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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