I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Sober me does NOT approve of what went on in my pants last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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