So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
This is not my ceiling
"it" just moved
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
just took a cab, driver just asked what i'd been drinking- i said vodka, he said "can't do vodka-drunk, it makes me feel like i'm giving birth to myself" ...no comment
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Randomize
