i just sat at a stop sign for 10 minutes waiting for it to turn green. i need to STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT.
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I just found a bag of chex mix in my clutch
You were feeding it to the bartender last night
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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