ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
6 margaritas later and free shots of tequila, i woke up with a fat lip and they said i blew my nose in a slice of bread
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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