So I'm going back to my apartment just to get my vibrator.
I thought you were moving in with your boyfriend for the summer?
Well....one will keep me from having to pay rent and the other satisfies. I'll let you figure it out.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
