Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
