I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
i'm going to be one of those im-wearing-a-shirt-as-a-dress girls today. dont make fun of me, i need laid
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Randomize
