Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
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