I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
I drank entirely too much. My skin hurts to wear
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize
