i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
