Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
Randomize
