I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
He called some chick he used to fuck for cash to get food delivered to cheer me up
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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