didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
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