after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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