Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
