There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
I knew it was going to be a good night when my mom said "Have fun, be safe...wait, do you need any weed for tonight?"
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I offered the opportunity to grope my boobs for pints. Two girls took me up.
Randomize