My friends, they love my intelligence
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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