and i looked up. we had an audience...
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I was alternating between saying "yall need Jesus" and "God bless" the entire night
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
