he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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