Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
Sweet! It'll be a "that-minor-I-used-to-serve-alcohol-to-is-no-longer-a-minor" party!!!
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
Randomize
