Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
You kept pointing at me and saying I'm getting chicken parmesan and no one is going to stop me
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
