We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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