i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
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Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
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they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
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