Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Will you bring a case of beer down to the hot tub? Me and Phil don't want to feel feelings anymore
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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