stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
Things you are not allowed to do while im gone: sell cats on ebay, put cats in freezer again, shave cats like lions, dye cats pink/blue, try to light cats on fire to"wake them up from their nap" agian
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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