Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
He said if I stayed the night he'd take me to church in the morning.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
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