this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Just walked pass a bum on the way to a coinstar... awkward
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
