I think scott just propositioned me for sex
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
