That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
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