Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Will you be my therapist? I don't want to tell me secrets to a strange person and be judged all over again when you have already taken the time to do it. Oh and I will pay you with alcohol
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
A bitchslap is in order.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
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