No, you can still breathe under the balls.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
Randomize
