They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
i should probably find things i have in common with someone besides drinking, before having sex with them
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
