My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Found someone cuddling with my Uggs this morning. Guess the hundred pillows laying next to him weren't good enough.
Randomize
