Screwed.edu
What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
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